Life + The Universe + Everything = ?

There are weighty issues most of us ponder from time to time, regarding the nature of existence, the purpose of life, and etc. The most advanced species in the galaxy (mice, for the record) set out to find the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything in Douglas Adams' The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy... and succeed. Unfortunately for the mice, the answer to life, the universe and everything, after 7.5 million years of calculation, is... 42.

The Hitchhiker's Guide begins with the story's protagonist, Arthur Dent, who is hung over, unable to remember what he was so angry about the night before. He remembers, though, when he notices the bulldozers in front of his house. They're there to do what bulldozers do best - bulldoze - his house. He stands in their path to protect his house, but leaves with his friend Ford Prefect (an alien pretending to be an out-of-work actor) to go to a bar after Ford convinces the head bulldozer operator to sit in front of the bulldozers for Arthur. Unfortunately for everyone, Arthur's situation foreshadows that of the planet; the Vogon aliens are about to build a galactic freeway. The Vogons' loudspeakers notify earth that "your planet is one of those scheduled for demolition. The process will take slightly less than two Earth minutes. Thank you." (31) Ford and Arthur hitch a ride on one of the Vogon ships before Earth is vaporized, but they get thrown off after they insult the captain's poetry. Before they suffocate in space, however, they stick out their thumbs and manage to get picked up by a stolen spaceship, piloted by the President of the Galaxy, Zaphod Beeblebrox. Zaphod and his crew, including Marvin the Chronically Depressed Robot, are out to loot Magrathea, a very rich planet. Magrathea's defense systems fire two missles at their ship, but by a freak accident of mathematical uncertainty, the missiles, turn into "a bowl of petunias and a very surprised-looking whale." (123) On Magrathea, the crew learns of the mice's using a computer to find the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything. They were unsatisfied with the answer of 42, though, and built a better computer to find out what the question actually was. That computer turns out to have been Earth, which the Vogons destroyed "five minutes before it was finished" calculating the ultimate question (192). The mice want to cut open Arthur's brain, since it was a product of the Earth's unfinished calculation, but he manages to get away just before this installment of the "five part trilogy" ends.

The best part of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is its use of humor. The prologue tells us that "in the beginning the Universe was created. This has been widely regarded as a bad move." It also explains that Earth is such a primitive planet that its "ape-descended life forms... still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea" (1). In the beginning of the story, the bulldozer operators, anxious to demolish Arthur's house, but frustrated at his lack of cooperation, "sit around drinking coffee and experimenting with union regulations to see how they could turn the situation to their financial advantage" (12). When the Vogons announce Earth's impending demolition, they say "there's no point in acting all surprised about it," since "all the planning charts... have been on display in your local planning department in Alpha Centauri." (31). When the Union of Philosophers and Psychologists learn of the mice's plan to discover the answer to the Question of life, The Universe, and Everything, they protest violently, insisting that if humans knew the meaning of life, they'd be out of a job. The mice diffuse the situation by reminding the union representatives that it will take 7.5 million years to come up with the answer, during which time they could make tons of money treating those questioning their purpose in the universe.

Adding to the humor are the off-the-wall inventions and explanations in the story, leading one to wonder what type of mind-altering chemicals Adams was under the influence of while writing the story. One example is the Babel Fish, a small fish, which can be inserted into one's ear and act as a translator for any language in the universe. According to the Hitchiker's Guide, the Babel Fish was also used to disprove the existence of God. God refused to provide proof of his existence, since he exists through faith, and faith needs no proof. However, man pointed out that "the Babel fish is a dead giveaway isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance," andtold God that that it " proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't." We've been on our own since that logical mix-up (55). Another is the revelation that Earth was just a really large supercomputer, designed to come up with the Question to Life, the Universe and Everything. Mice, it turns out, are actually multi-dimensional beings, who happen to appear to be small fuzzy rodents when observed from three-dimensional space. Further, all those experiments humans conduct with the mice running through the mazes are actually the mice controlling humans - by pretending to forget where the cheese is, they've been able to influence the course of human behavioral science (just to mess with us). Benjy and Frankie Mouse, who want to lobotomize Arthur to extract the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything, explain that "the whole business with the cheese and the squeaking is just a front." (190) Last, but not least, is the Improbability drive, which powers Zaphod's stolen spaceship, the Golden Heart. The Improbability Drive uses advanced statistical mathematics to figure out what the chance of some highly unlikely event occurring is, then determines the motion of the spaceship so precisely that it could statistically be anywhere in the universe (via a clever application of quantum uncertainty, and a source of very randomly moving particles, such as a cup of hot tea). This has the advantage of providing nearly instantaneous travel to anywhere in the universe, but has the drawback of causing very improbably events to occur (such as missiles turning into a bowl of petunias and a sperm whale).

At the end of this installment of the five-part trilogy, we're left not knowing what the Question to Life, The Universe, and Everything is, so we'll still have to rely on philosophers for vague answers to deep questions for a while longer. The best advice for surviving that is on the cover of the Guide - DON'T PANIC!